Spacehunter: Adventures in the Forbidden Zone

0:00 Hey everyone it's Brad before the episode starts. I just wanted to apologize for this being a week late. There's just been a lot going on and it hasn't seemed like a great time to be doing some fun stuff like putting together a podcast but I do want to apologize and I hope you enjoy our last episode of Molly Ringwald May even though it is dropping in June. Enjoy. The Grandma. The Grandma. We've got blood loss Brad. We have blood loss. We've got blood loss Brad. Yes. And my other

0:40 Brad fact is that this movie largely went ignored in the United States but became the 10th Beth Belling video cassette of 1983. Cyborg. What are you going on? I mean there's nothing. There's nothing. Just get me frustrated. Yeah. Stripper slowly. He's a wolf. He's a long wolf. Oh clever. Welcome to does it hold up the podcast dedicated to potentially ruining your

1:13 childhood and all of your fond memories that happened before mom and dad were up taken into the zone. I'm brought. I'm Brad Christ. Yeah I'm sorry I couldn't resist that. So we are rounding out Molly Ringwald May with yeah perhaps one of her lesser known films you know we had some options. There's there's the one where she gets pregnant that came out after all the ones we already did for keeps there's the what is it the mini series the stand that was on in the 90s based

1:50 on Stephen King's book she was in that but no we are going to be talking about space hunter adventures in the Forbidden Zone and if I know nobody yes I'm sorry because I feel like most people have no idea what the hell we're talking about but yeah well I'm all about getting some star credits because the last dark heads yet and Christ this movie was bad yeah so this was an interesting one I had never seen it all the way through as we were watching it I noted there were

2:25 times where I was like wait I think I've seen like this part so I'm feeling like it was on HBO and like Tyler and I would be clicking through Tyler's my brother would be clicking through it we'd like stumble on it and be like what and then you keep going but see Brad and I didn't do that because we had it I'm pretty sure I'm beta oh yeah we did we have this a grimy dirty movie anyway but on a taped from a copy probably from like a VHS to a beta tape with that you know degradation

2:56 and quality it will I remember being gross more I think that's what caused this movie to be gross this movie is gross I think I bought it wait I think I bought it it's an HD right now it's so disgusting like it is everyone is slimy and like gooey and there's a lot of standard what I don't understand what is going on half the time well actually the whole time there's no understanding it I mean I would I was an asshole I made my girlfriend watch this the other night she did not like it I mean

3:35 she's still currently but you know to be I don't think that this is going to be the determination hopefully not but it was this was a fucking train wreck like I don't think it's take away like the movie ended and I turned abroad and I was like that's it well we'll go into that later let's go into heaven they have a great party at the end we talk about they they party it's such a fucking

4:05 bizarre it's okay I mean I mean I'm kind of with you I don't know what happened except for Molly Ringwald is an annoying teenager that at some point the guy thinks she's old enough so he wants to fuck her but then she's not so then I can't get that I didn't get any of that I didn't get that vibe at all but I didn't get that vibe no no no it's like no what he first meets her before he realizes she stinks because she hasn't bathed in a while he's totally trying to fuck her you think

4:36 so no okay let's put it this way it wasn't quite as overt as the geek from 16 candles okay it's not rapey like that no but he's like all right we'll go into it because at that point you know he's looking for an outlet because of something that happened earlier sorry hold on I'll put it can I put it a different light maybe he isn't but she thinks that's what's going on okay okay she thinks

5:08 and she's like I'm not gonna do that with you living with that nasty ass planet again we're we're really getting ahead of it doesn't matter it's nothing this this movie's nothing it doesn't matter this show the official title is Space Hunter Adventures in the Forbidden Zone it's a 1983 space western film and if you've ever seen the TV show Firefly well if you have it I don't I should see it but it's like that but gross I mean it I can see where you could maybe compare the

5:45 two but you also they're nothing this is this is a direct firefly stole this Oh Tony yeah then made it a little better and by a little I'm kidding I'm kidding I haven't ever seen firefly I don't know fireflies great they stole this from Ravenstar okay but anyway so it's 1983 space western it came out in the early 80s when 3D was sort of making a really weird resurgence with like Friday the 13th 3D and yaws 3D and a lot of other really really shitty movies and when you watch this there's actually I

6:23 didn't see a lot but every so often you get that I saw the way I only saw two maybe okay where the title sequence and then one part where he's going to shoot the people with the needle with the needle team and that's it that's it yeah yeah there really wasn't that much it's not like for god they forgot halfway through yeah we're supposed to be 3D yeah so and it it's got some decent people in

6:54 it who like did other things and honestly there was some truth me well I mean we'll get into it but I didn't realize that it was directed or written or produced or something by Ivan Reitman who did he said he's an executive producer right Elmer Bernstein did the damn soundtrack which granted he did robot monster like back in the 60s but for the most part is a well respected composer and I mean you know Molly Ringwald as we mentioned it's got Ernie Hudson who was Winston from Ghostbusters

7:24 Peter Strauss is the main character and you probably don't know who that is but if you ever saw the secret of him it's Justin he was Justin and you know the best rat of the good rat the really good rat you're saying his best acting career was voice acting in secret I remember him he's been in a crapload of like TV shows and stuff but I mean I remember him as being Justin he's not he's not terribly but I mean he's done other things but then the hero Reimas is the boy yeah Egon came in as a

7:57 voice at one point I don't know if yeah in the very beginning when he's talking about parking tickets it was weird because I always thought this was just like Peter Strauss Molly Ringwald and a bunch of nobodies and then I'm watching I'm like wait that's Michael Ironside you know Jester Jester from Top Gun sort of I wouldn't have known it necessarily if I hadn't watched you know looked at the uh the over dog you mean his name is over dog in this one yeah right right over dog what the fuck kind of name is that it was weird and obscure and full of nothing as I remember that

8:28 doesn't mean it was good it's just as a kid I didn't realize who some of the people oh what they're talking when the fact people are in the the people tattooed oh my god my one brad fact is that Oberdong's original name in the script was king creep that's better than over dog the fake over dog is stupid what the fuck the over dog it's like under dogs rival I know but it also but

8:58 he's like a science they mentioned how he's a scientist and how they mutated they had the virus and all that and then his name was over dog like what the like he was a doctor doctor something whatever call him doctor virus doctor shipface whatever but something really better I mean yeah so yeah doctor yeah I mean anything over dog is so stupid it is doctor creepy would have been better because I mean he is really really creepy doctor doctor doctor uh i'm going to take their clothes off yeah with my claw hands oh my god you know i'm going to get

9:32 sexual satisfaction i will say satisfaction he did satisfaction with when i'm robotic from like the chest down but whatever and i'm like hanging in hanging in the ceiling yeah whatever I mean my other brad fact is that uh this movie largely went ignored in the United States but became the 10th shopping video cassette of 1983 where what for them i mean i mean in the United States okay so a lot of people had this on video but did not go see it in the theater i don't

10:03 remember wait wait wait wait was that vhs or beta max i don't know i don't have that yes i mean it was a battle battle royale that point uh the height the height of the video cassette war so we haven't even gotten into the actual plot synopsis yet but yeah those are my brothers i i've i've got a i've got a brad fact they rushed the release of it apparently to get it out of a week behead ahead of uh return the jedi came out the same year and they wanted to get out ahead of that because they thought they

10:36 could get some overflow when people couldn't get into that movie they could get the fucking carry over from that they were full of and it's like that wasn't misjudgment because you know the star died after that i haven't seen any more star war films yeah i know that was they they changed it up and put it into 3d and then one of the taglines for the poster that they put next to i guess return to the jedi was the first movie that puts you in outer space because it all takes place on a planet

11:09 i mean you're in space for like five minutes and then you're in Utah the rest of the time but you're in space in like a weird like uh like like parking it's like cops telling you you gotta move out of your parking space space where like it's like you've got parking like it i even Reichmann says it in the he's it's his voice he's like you got a bunch of parking tickets you got to move over your wife is looking for alimony it's like this weird and then they like they're out of space

11:41 after that it's just weird yeah space is i mean that's something i do want to talk about once we get into the plot a little bit which we have an even story um because is he the space hunter is that is that what the deal is i think he's a space hunter i think he's the space what the hell is he scattered where where's i don't know where's the forbidden zone is that where they go well we talk about what they talked about that that's where the over or under the over dog is around up dog up dog up dog that's where that's with you it's yeah exactly that's where over dog lives

12:18 which apparently is an area of the planet that he controls maybe i know but there's some virus and there's a there's a lot of stuff they like kind of gloss over and he's got some weird hand spinner it brings me back to this let me start reading the plot synopsis on our friend wikipedia and maybe while we're doing it we can kind of see if we can as we get to different pieces we can say like maybe it was supposed to be this or maybe because that a lot of this movie is well maybe that's what that is or maybe this is what that means because yeah don't get this would be any credit this

12:48 movie was what it is okay so here we go space hunter adventures in the forbidden zone set in the early 22nd century the film opens with the destruction of 2136 i remember i saw it what was it 2136 i think it's the year no the film opens with the destruction of a space cruise liner by a bolt of nebular lightning yeah the only apparent survivors are three beautiful women nova reena and mega do we ever really get their names i have made in the credits okay who get away

13:20 and escape pod and land on the nearest habitable planet uh the e-planet type habitable god i can't i can't read habitable planet that i could first wait wait hold on okay beautiful i mean like i don't know i couldn't tell underneath all that yet all the idiots make this like they got the hair going yeah i don't i couldn't tell you there um there they are quickly accosted by hostile natives and take an aboard a sail driven vehicle resembling a pirate ship on rails okay so i guess

13:54 that's one way to describe it yeah what my my i mean there's so many complaints but my biggest complaint about this movie is that there's like nine story arcs and none of them you get no like there's no resolution to any of them like what's with the it's like a cruise liner like like walley or something like they're out the space on this cruise liner and then it blows up and this pod goes out of it and it's the only pod that makes it off the ship the whole thing just blows up and there's three women land on this planet and you i mean they're the whole thing

14:31 and wait are they important who are they i mean i mean that's where you mess that that's where you're messing it there are two other movies we just didn't watch yet where they talk about pod two and pod three but you want to see what happens space hunter journeys this provisions again and and and yeah no it's not you're not far off because i feel like if they made two more movies they could tie up the bajillion loose ends that are here yeah because that's the way that's if that's your

15:04 problem with this movie then no i said there's one in the very beginning the one that was baffled me the most was i mean we don't like brockus mentioned there's the the train that has sales and they in grandfather or whatever they call him who has the grand man grand man who has blood loss they don't like they just had this quick scene with them yeah fucking kill half of them and then they're off it's like that's it we're jumping ahead people no i haven't it just says that they were

15:39 picked up we haven't gotten into anything bad happening oh my god there's been no blood loss yet so just yeah it is i mean i'm with you it is so weird that we follow well it's not weird we follow the one couple like that's not that strange like that's the whole bit of the movie but i find it weird that the three women they're following are trying to rescue don't actually have a line in the movie until about an hour and fifteen minutes into the movie other than other than screaming other

16:12 than are they like some senator's trip i think we can assume i think we can assume they're rich people because they're on a cruise ship but anyway this move this episode will be three hours if we keep it this sorry keep going babe all right so we got this so you're all about it don't have it there's there's like a five-minute scene in space and now we're on the planet then we go back to space for a little bit and then we're pretty much on the planet the rest of the time so in space and

16:45 alert goes out to the safe return of the women with a reward of three thousand mega credits a small time salvage operator named wolf intercepts the message and heads to the planet wait i know there's details here we want to get into uh joining him is his female engineer chalmers who learns the planet here that's what it says just let me get through this joining him is his female engineer chalmer who learns the planet called terra 11 is a failed colony that fell victim to a deadly plague and

17:16 civil warfare wolf risks the dangers believing the reward will solve his debt problems all right have added his debt problems wait wait his debt problems are the fact is he has a bunch of parking tickets and he owes some alimony right like that's what they that's what they reference in the yes that's my narrow room it says and if chalmers is an engineer i'm the pope chalmers is a fantastic success robot that i mean and he and he mentions it he's like i mean he's talking about like he says some i came

17:52 remember what how he's like i got i'm glad i got you the negligible and then because obviously if she was walking around naked all the time he couldn't keep his hands off i don't know what's going on there it's such a weird repair you don't really get at least i didn't right away that she's a robot she gets up she's sleeping she gets up she fixes his console well he like loves the engineer part he like no he no he says he wakes her up one time that could be right no it's just something i'm

18:23 required four hours to i'm required for it no i'm in requirement this is the future so there's no union in the future have you not we're in we're 2020 i mean come on they're definitely gone gone by 2136 i mean you think they're right they're right we're going um sort of go off on the side tangent there but no i mean so he and chalmers his his engineer engineer whatever go off to try

18:53 use and quotation marks every day every time you say engineer because i can't see them air quotes yes no i'm doing air quotes okay i'm not doing air quotes i'm just i'm just basing it on what wikipedia says to try to not confuse people so uh after landing on the baron world wolf and chalmers set out in a four-wheel drive vehicle called the scrambler which is a dodge pickup truck that this is this is one of the like craziest like it's so stupid they like show you him taking the straps off of it from like it was strapped down for in flight on his

19:31 spacecraft it's like why are we watching him unstrap the fucking and then they kick the garage door essentially open because i can't get it open and she kicks it it's like what the fuck like is this supposed to be like everything this man owns is a piece of shit apparently all gross it's all dirty and dingy and weird he's like i built that myself and it's like well it's made out of plexiglass and the future is awful what here it is yeah this one no i do i do i do have a

20:03 question though so right here they get out on the scrambler right they're driving off and she and he says to chalmers she's like bury or like make it disappear or something like bury the ship in dirt so the ship buries itself into the dirt that has no ramification it doesn't it doesn't it doesn't it doesn't matter it nobody comes to the ship it never comes back up it never comes back up it's a dumb fucking thing this entire movie introduces something and then like never ties it up they

20:40 mentioned it very briefly at the end because i remember they the one wolf says to one of the other guys he's like i'm glad you found the ship meaning like it was hidden in dirt but it's just it's a passing line wait when they're having when they're having the party with the girls at the end where they're like it's a fuck party here we go okay see now people haven't seen this movie they're starting to realize that it has a happy ending and we really need it yeah we're really it hasn't it really has a happy ending yeah it doesn't have an idea i don't know we'll get into it so uh soon so okay so they're driving off in this four-wheel vehicle called the scrambler which is

21:12 just a truck soon they soon they join a battle in progress between a group of marauders called the zoner and a band of nomads the scavs the zoners take the women before wolf can stop them and fly away on jet powered hang gliders okay so there's okay the zoners wait the zoners are the jet power guys bad guys i guess technically and and who has the blood loss that's the the scavs have the blood loss and they're the ones who see the women get up taken by the hang gliders and they're

21:47 also the ones who are on the pirate ship on rails okay but okay but we skip the whole part when they land okay we gotta back a bit the women land on the on the planet right and the voice is like it's a safe planet you can take your helmets off and on that so who kidnaps them at that point that's the scavs they just kind of like take them they're running from people like and not wanting to go you know that they're not going to hurt them at that point i think that these really weird

22:21 people come out of nowhere and basically do grab them but i think that you find the the connotation is that they're not dangerous is this they get taken by the zoners and the zoners with their special hang gliders right i got that part but so they're kidnapped so they're double kidnaps what you're saying yeah pretty much you know but who they were taken okay okay let's put this in star wars connotation they were first taken by the jaw was but then the empire got there you go okay you went from that word who who is it is dressed in like the uh like trash bags

22:58 who is that those are those are the scavs and they're the ones they have the pirate ship they're the jawless and they're the ones with all the swaying okay and but they cannot stop the pirate ship that they have a pirate ship on a train that i don't know why but it's on rails and they can't stop it until like well they're really easy when it was like their train can only go one way because you have a track and they just oh put something in front of it and they're like fuck we gotta stop and now they're gonna fight people she's headed along the track and apparently

23:32 that's the the pirate ship train can't go through that yeah it's kind of both it was it was weak i'll give you that and then he comes and come on and i know and then and then wolf comes running and charmer's like who side are you on he's like i'm on my own and he just goes that he starts shooting everybody like he shoots the fuck out of road but he's got some witty one liners uh the best part go away when he kicks the guy in the nuts and he's like works every he basically looks at the

24:03 camera it's like works every time it's like what the fuck did i just see like this is what we're doing here we're gonna actually break the court ball and do this he's free fairs bueller he's Han Solo man he's a Han Solo never kicked anyone nuts and Han Solo shot first and Han Solo also did not look at the camera and say i shot first i mean come on yeah but i think that was that is way you might have anyway uh that was so bad we have to get to there's a lot to read Brad there's

24:35 a good bit more right here so okay let me read until i say stop because there's a really good part coming up we need to talk about so um where did we end up here so does it matter home to scabs that the women were taken to speaking of dogs whoa sorry is that your over dog the over dog's mad okay i'll i'll start that line again all right do you need to do something with your dog that is all right all right um wolf learns from the scabs that the women were taken into the zone

25:11 which is ruled by over dog their sworn enemy returning to the scramber scrambler wolf finds chalmers who is really a genoid will go into that has been killed wolf continues on alone but soon catches a teenage scab named Nikki trying to steal his scrambler she convinces wolf that he needs a tracker if he is to survive the zone and wolf reluctantly takes her lead so first of all i don't know what the hell a genoid is but you basically find out that chalmers is a robot because she gets

25:44 shot and then like part of her head is missing and then had she's missed her she got shot in her shoulders gone and then he pushes some button on the remote and melts her ass and that like was thinking that i right before it happened i was like she dies i told him and i'm like she dies in a weird way gross way or that that was one of the first like this is a disturbing scene that i had some kind of recollection from from back when i was a kid that part freed me out i couldn't do melting when i was a kid i couldn't watch the end of raiders of the lost ark oh we're back to

26:18 her hair support and i hated this scene there's something with her melting there anyway why does he carry that around why do you melt her right it's the point see again she does all his she knows all his deep dark sexual secrets he's got to get rid of the browser cash is that what it is yeah he's like i can't let i can't let her know oh my god she knows she knows she knows she knows she's in all my kinks she knows what's going on i got to melt this bitch yeah clear history button

26:48 yeah clear history yeah so that was that scene that that bit always was weird to me so yeah so now he's got niki and niki is molly ringwald yes who's like 15 in this movie 14 she's really young yeah um all right so now niki is with wolf reluctantly in the meantime the three women were taken before she's not reluctantly she's not reluctantly she's not reluctantly she's not willing anything to do with her because you know he's full artist he's a loner and she's he's the

27:22 wolf he's on the own wolf oh clever oh yeah it's so clever so in the meantime the three women are taken before the chemist the chief henchman of overdog a hideous cyborg with giant metal claws for hand how impractical is that who administers pacifying drugs to the girls and prepares them for overdogs pleasure so he's really he's he's really delicate with his boss i mean he could like yeah

27:53 those women like it yeah we need to make sure this is clear because this is essential to the plot yeah the chemist yeah roofies the girls so that they're not totally freaked out by overdog because overdog is two-thirds robot including these giant horrible clawed hands and like for the chest down he's got like a steady cam arm like like he should be in the aliens movie with like baskets i mean it's just i don't know what the hell he is he is creepy i mean he he's so delicate with those claws

28:25 though the women love it they love it he's so delicate yeah yeah because at one point he's like ogling the women overdog and i'm like you can't do anything it's so weird it's nothing there it's addressed or slowly yeah it's so weird see there's over or is it well i mean that's expected he's the bad guy but it's like dude you you got like what a cyborg what are you going on i mean there's nothing there's nothing just get me frustrated yeah strip or slowly i don't i don't understand

28:58 i don't i don't get i don't get the chemist guys like i'm gonna do this for him i'm gonna undress these women for you because what there's no relationship between what like there's like just let him hang in the wood like he could hang on the ceiling he gives all be like fuck you overdog we're not gonna do anything and then what would he do he's not gonna come after you he can't come down from the ceiling so be like oh fuck off don't ask he's he's job of the hut he's got the maze

29:28 though he does have the maze basically what he is he's afraid i seriously just thought of this he's job of the hut job i can't yeah okay but i think this is fair i'm not gonna say they still this is pre-job like it's a week before job i just started to think of like basically what it is you know he lives in like this really weird fortress somehow he has control over all of these other people he's not very involved despite the fact that he's not mobile in any way and he makes them we'll get into it run through like an obstacle course which is like whatever the monsters call that they drop

30:01 okay it's not the solid note the one we drop them into in his palace oh the uh the the one the loop kills and the guy cries over yeah it doesn't matter so everybody everybody every stop yelling at us are uh hey wait i forgot to say this before we started but i want to give a shout out to our two uh Icelandic listeners and we have a Italian listener and we also have a we have the a few uk listeners and a one from the uh Czech Republic sorry i forgot to say that earlier you're

30:36 um you're assuming they're gonna listen to a second episode i'm off to assuming they're gonna get this far into this one i mean if you're still here thank you thank you yeah i hope you're enjoying it and uh don't wash this i really hope you haven't heard of this movie yeah for real right all right so elsewhere wolf and nicky make camp but soon come under attacked by a strange plow-like vehicle wolf manages to disable the machine and learns the driver is a former military acquaintance of his

31:07 a soldier named washington who reveals he too has come to rescue the women his only problem is that he crashed his ship and has no way off of the world they're on wolf refuses is to help i'm sorry wolf refuses to help his rival and leaves him to fend for himself okay so here we go we've introduced another character the wisdom they yeah winston from both busters lando kara scene yeah the lando they're the they hint at this relationship that they used to have they certainly know each other

31:39 right and you feel like okay we're gonna get some backstory no nothing like if they if they worked together then maybe they were they were soldiers together right and maybe they were friends but then it turns out that they're not friends anymore because something happened who knows what uh man what did you want a flashback into them them fighting at the galactic blah blah blah fighting what what did you want back i wanted a montage i mean yeah but i'm just okay i'm saying i'm gonna go back we're gonna compare it to star wars all the time you go to empire right now

32:14 winston's supposed to be and this is horribly racist 1980s he's supposed to be the billy be william the lanny kara kara scene win han seo and then they land at the cloud city at besbin they don't tell you what other than i know the guy like that's all they say so like they don't mean but i will argue with you that you have it you find out that the millennium falcon used to be landos i mean you get little bits there's at least some i mean they don't sit down and they're not

32:46 a ship though like we're supposed to say that that bullshit crawler used to be mine he wouldn't claim that shit nobody claimed that shit you know like there's just nothing it's like okay they know each other and obviously you're angry at one another they kind of hit that again i get it i mean i don't think it's any i don't find that to be that weird really like i don't want to go back to wait but to go back to empire strikes back it's like you've got a lot of nerve showing up after what you pulled and then start working and then you kind of get like the joking between them and it's like

33:20 you know you get a little like you know you find out that lando used to be a smuggler and now he's running the gas mines and and it's not like major exposition it's just it happens while the movie's going on you find out some of their back history right now i get that i'm not listen i'm not gonna compare this to one of the best movies ever i'm not gonna compare it what i'm saying though is that i don't think i think they gave him a little bit of backstory like they were together sure they could have given more this movie doesn't give any detail on anybody so like that's the point yeah

33:54 that's the kind of my point is that like they just keep throwing new things and you don't get any like they're not kidding it's like how are they connected there's like nine story arcs because another thing is that the movie itself is only an hour and a half now not that i was asking for another half an hour of this movie but you could have added in a little bit more and not made it horribly wrong you wouldn't even you wouldn't have had to do that when they're he's like you know he's talking to him about how like he he's oh you're still with the service and he could have been all all Ernie Hudson slash Winston would have had to say is yeah after what happened on planet

34:29 on take a run we can be a family we can be stupid i mean even if you're gonna if my wife's dead because of you there you go the rest of the movie's got throwaway stuff in it i mean you can at least give him that like okay well this is why he doesn't ask all my blood loss on uh yes after i was uptake in it you went over there yeah so like i was just anything i was like who the fuck is this and why didn't driving a snowplow yeah yeah which actually was reconditioned snowplow from there snowplow that falls apart like three times actually in the movie for a while yeah and they're finally

35:00 at the end he's like it's falling apart i don't i don't know what to do so they actually kind of like joined forces they joined forces for a bit and then they don't there's kind of a weird back and forth but so uh back to Wikipedia still led by Nikki wolf gets into more predicaments from being attacked by mutant humanoid mutated humanoids to strange amazon-like women oh i love that part yes with the amazon-like human fear can we talk about them yeah we'll get hold on let me finish let me

35:31 just get through this there's a lot there's stuff here they haven't even mentioned he even loses his trust trusty scrambler and is forced to continue on foot eventually they are found by washington ernie hudson's character and wolf finds the situation reversed as he now begs his rival for help they agree to a 50/50 split of the reward so when they first meet up wolves like go to hell washington and then when they meet up again wolves in trouble and so they actually agree to help each other but they talk about the um the weird humanoids which were like the the slime people i

36:06 don't even know how to describe another memory from childhood that freaked me out all right but wait i need to back up we don't talk about the weird scene where he takes molly ringwald and like shoves her into the lake and bathes her that is such a strange i mean i that's uh that's a scene i remember as a kid like what the fuck and like because he's driving and he's obviously saying like he's opens the window he could smell her and then and then they get to this little place and then he

36:39 that's and then he that's when ernie hudson uh shows up shows up and then he throws his weapon into the lake where he just but he forcibly like i don't know how i don't know how they did that scene because he is literally like dunking her in the water yeah yeah uh i mean it's going to be worse if that had been written by john hues as we've learned she'd have a naked she would have been naked there would have been tits but at least there weren't any tits i mean there was like wet clothing but i

37:11 thought it was i didn't find it is it was kind of weird but she obviously was just great disgusting yeah but my what i have more of a problem with are the mutated humanoids they run into the fat white guys the fat white uh like they were there yeah they do look like tardigrade stuff like tardigrades but like fucked up tardigrades yeah and they're like at one point they're pushing through that great and they're like in a grain silo right essentially is what it is and they're like they're

37:42 up and they're like pushing through that one it's like a man cover to like it's it's great it and they're like but it looks so fake but it's still so disgustly looking and they the thing is like they never tell you they're they're obviously bad and they're gross and i remember yeah and when they're shooting them do you what they are like are they in terms of the plague are they it's just there they are you're in danger they get away and you never see them okay so so far when they shoot themselves

38:12 out of that out of all the tubes out down towards the water slides yeah our story arcs we have are the the women in the cruise ship yep we have wolf and charlman's and whoever he is really we have nicky how did how did she get there we've got the scabs and the space or the pirate ship train we've got washington and whatever's going on with him and wolf we've got the bloated yucky guys

38:42 and now we've got the amazon women and the water dragon so we're up there apparently but see the the amazon women and the water dragon are doing related because the amazon women are afraid of the water dragon they run off when it shows up everything looks everything when you get through the water dragon part i can't believe i said that but when we get to that scene when we get to that fucking scene it's so fucking bizarre because everything everything in this movie looks like it looks like it's a good and i'm not knocking a theater production i'm just saying it's a movie

39:15 it's supposed to look grandiose and everything looks like it's like we're doing it as a play like they like the theater the set for they're trying to drive the scrambler through this place and and molly wringall gets out and walks like five feet ahead of it and she's like you're good over here and then all of a sudden she gets sucked into some vortex and then he dives in water level keeps changing why are they why'd they go that way i don't know right you could obviously go you could obviously go around there's a whole fucking mountain of sand you could go over and

39:49 because that's where they come out yeah i don't yeah he gets the scrambler out for him oh that's right he rescued they have to abandon all has to abandon his vehicle in this water area somehow washington comes along after ernie hudson's character and gets it does this fucking matter can we stop like this movie so fucking stupid why are we talking about him well okay but one of the other things that i wanted to mention that i didn't say when we were watching it because i was

40:19 saving it for this moment yeah that scene where they're doing the amazon mermaid women and the water dragon thing it's reversed that set reminded me of blast hard cheese driving through the little truck oh god from space mutiny wow yeah you're talking about it wait wait wait wait did you notice that when they come out of the water ever seems reversed they've they they the film is back there because they're supposed to come out real fast but it what it is they're going into the water and

40:53 they've reversed it so it looks like they're coming out real fast yeah all right we'll tell you what since this movie is just not all that great why don't we just let me get i have got another paragraph and then a sentence okay and we can be done with the synopsis and we can talk about anything we haven't talked about okay go and then we can get the hell out of the zone go and not worry about outrolling or up taking or a grand people over dog or whatever it up dog up dog everybody so prepare yourselves it gets crazy wolf in washington team up and sneak into overdogs fortress where

41:27 they find the zoners entertained by capture prisoners forced to run through a deadly maze of lethal obstacles hazards and traps wolf spots the women being held in a cage and forms a rescue plan but a bored Nikki who was left out of the rescue for her safety decides to swoop to snoop around she is captured and sent into the maze wolf spots Nikki in the maze and tries to rescue her but she uses her prowess to reach the end where overdog congratulates her and drags her back to his lair there

41:59 she is hooked to a machine that slowly drains her life energy the energy in turn recharges overdog wolf comes to the rescue and jabs a sparking power cable into one of overdogs claws the power feedback fries overdog and thus causes cascading blowouts throughout the entire fortress as the fortress explodes around them wolf and Nikki run for cover and are rescued by a timely by the timely arrival of washington who was driving the plow machine with nova reena and megan the three girls

42:31 they went to rescue driving another commandeer vehicle they all race out of the fortress in the nick of time as it explodes behind them i thought they were driving this that's just what it says okay as the complex explodes the three heroes who the fuck are they okay and the three rescued women managed to get away in the ending wolf invites Nikki to stay with him and she agrees since they made good partners and then there's a space orgy and the ship flies away with a cheesy

43:01 end kind of warp thing and it's over and it's just over it's just that's what i'm saying we go from the bloated yucky dudes to the amazon women and the water dragon then we go to the overdog maze chemist plague fortress whatever the hell that's all about then there's the life-training energy thing that just sort of shows up and then the movies over and they're flying away and that is an hour and a half it was a short movie there's ten damn pop like there's ten arcs here that they

43:32 don't tie any of it up yeah none of it so i think that one of the things that makes brown are you still there rat hello can you hear me now we lost you oh i paused it i had a visitor sorry is everything okay yeah everything's fine all right well we would have to edit this piece out so Amanda just had a rant no i heard her man is rant i heard it so yeah i think one of the things that makes this an

44:03 interesting film for us to cover is that it's not a good movie it never was a good movie and i doubt a lot of people have fond memories of this movie maybe they do so i don't know it's just we're not going into this like i remember 16 candles being a great movie i remember loving pretty and pink i just remember this movie being gross and weird and yet i watched it a lot right yeah that's what i remember like i remember those slimy guys popping out of those little holes and like trying to eat

44:39 them like they look like i don't know what they're i don't know what to call like they're disgusting i mean they're gross yeah she's she's my my feeling when we finished the movie i was like it was just disturbing and i can't put my finger on it exactly what like the whole thing like yeah okay like the fat water grub oh wait we didn't even talk about the little kids that show oh god oh god we didn't oh my god okay i'm sorry there's a love in story art at one point let me just

45:13 kind of react to it for people who haven't seen the movie so at one point they meet back up with two of the people from the pirate ship because the people right and they're all trying to kill overdog so they meet up and they're like they're kind of in this i don't want to call it a valley but they're in this area and there's some cliffs all around them and then all of a sudden these like mutant children children are throwing them off and they say some weird shit it's like and they throw shit oh my god it's fucking creepy just there they're just creepy and dangerous and

45:49 again you escape and there's nothing you never talk about we don't know if they're plague victims we don't know is it like like megalon like these are children that the overdog or the chemists were like yeah i mean i will give the movie credit because there's one point where Ernie Hudson's character says like i want to get out of here this whole planet this whole planet and i'm like yes yes you nailed it i'm glad that at least the people in the movie get that yes definitely he looks

46:19 that he should just might as well look at the camera and be like this is fucking weird i'm out i'm gonna go i'm gonna go chase some ghosts because this is so fucking weird i'm gonna go catch some ghosts and and you know go back to aliens they just need to nuke the entire place from yep i mean yeah that planet needs to go away yeah like i said that just we when the movie was done i just had this like general unease it was like i i don't like i don't feel good yeah and and that was i

46:50 remember trying to describe it beforehand and just saying like i just remember it just made me it was just a weird dirty right yeah i remember mentioning to you i was like is it like um dude like the the the not the the video series the movie with um kyle lachlan and yeah the and i was like is it like is it like like that just like dark and frost did you ever see dune i'd never saw it yeah yeah like is it like not we're kids all right or what we're not we're kids we'll watch it right when we were like teenagers i remember watching you watched it with your uncle yeah i don't know if

47:24 you remember that well you were even there but at one time uh who was big into it i remember that yeah and he actually like i watched it with him and he explained it as it was happening and it made more sense and i thought the movie was better but it was still even it's sort of that like even i don't know if you've seen blade runner that's what i was saying that was the other movie ass rock i was like it's a blade runner is a very like just dark it's just a very just dystopian gross image of the future and this was sort of like that but blade runners for lack of a better term

47:56 very wet there's a lot of rain right this was very dry and dingy and dirty and no this i i feel like this movie's moist though it really happened a lot in the water drag the and i mean totally every part of the trash compactor mark there from star wars i know but it's but again it's all like a theater scene like they can only drive the truck like two feet and they stop and then it's so fucking bad this movie we gotta do something yeah what we're watering it i don't know amazon

48:30 women yeah no i think it's like what kind of fucking he drives into the cave would he go around it like why would you go into the killings he's drives into a killing zone like he tried to kill lives yeah he wasn't very good at the military he got their entire squad killed in the military and that's why washington didn't like him it's like macho grande it is i'll never get over macho grande

49:01 is that you know this movie is early 80s star wars rip off campy space adventure you know and in that capacity yeah it's not really watchable watch it once i'm not going to watch it again it's not great it's not awful i mean it's not good i would not in the middle but unless you've seen this movie before i would not recommend every watch in this movie i don't know if you want to be disturbed if you're just feeling like nothing good about like

49:31 it is a it's just a shit movie we have to remember kids and we had to play that's the biggest problem is that the movie the the story just isn't all that great it's very there's too many of them and nothing happens that makes it not great and really to be honest this is not fair i'm gonna i need to put this out there real quick because i know she's gonna listen eventually molly ringwald this is not fair to you this is not who you are this is not your movie but acting wasn't bad she pulled off like

50:02 the the one she is really she's really good at playing the bratty kit lea she is i don't know what you're talking about uh you better take me to the spaceport but i don't know yeah she's really good at that part but this is not her like this is not it's all you give i'll even give uh peter shrouds a pass to like i don't know what else he was doing but like christ this is all you got like this is what you get i feel like that the actors did a good job with what they were needed and what they had

50:38 wasn't much i said Brad Brad is this coming above or below legend i'm still above man you know that come on are you still watch this above legend yeah legend can i almost said something vulgar there i'm going to keep it clean but legend is right so yeah this um okay well here's what i would recommend okay if you've never seen this movie and never heard of this movie just skip it if you like bad movies give it a watch if you watch if you remember

51:12 it vaguely from your childhood watch it one more time and then just move on if you've got really good drugs and you want to get fucked up you could do that and watch this movie if you really like Ernie Hudson watch this movie if you really like if you like Peter Strauss's voice if you like snow plants if you like mr plow if you like mutated humanoid creatures and creepy children that throw bombs this movie if you want to see cherry iron sides in a contraption where he is basically

51:45 locked it by his back and has huge claws as hands yeah if you're into like this is the movie you're moving um if if you want to watch matt max but you don't want a storyline if you like the idea of a pirate ship on rails watch this movie you'll get to see it you want to hear about if you want to hear about if if in your spare time you hang glide and you want to attach a rocket to it watch this movie if you want to see a cyborg or feel like we're jeff foxworth you know if you

52:18 want to see a cyborg melt into the earth watch this movie yeah i mean but if none of those things appeal to you if you don't like sci-fi if you think molly ringwald's annoying if you don't want to see what a tardigrade looks like when it's crossed with a human if creepy kids really just don't do it for you don't watch this movie if you want to see if you don't want to see snow plow break apart three times in a scene where they don't fix it don't watch this movie if you live in a broken

52:50 snow well makes you think of your uncle yeah don't watch this movie yeah um but yeah it's uh this was a weird one i definitely remember watching it um i definitely was scarred by a few of the scenes because i vaguely remembered them and i'm glad that i got to introduce my wife who has never seen this movie to it i will never be watching this again unless it's to torment somebody who's never seen it maybe if we had somebody over that we don't like i still don't get this there's people

53:20 who were in like cellophane do you remember those people in the beginning and they never touched them they're like they're the virus people because they're talking about some virus that that's another story arc you will vaguely abandon the virus see what happened montage definitely if we got famous they're needed they're needed i was going to say if we get famous the only way i could see us revisiting this is if we had molly ringwald on and say yes what do you remember about this movie because to be like i was 14 i was getting paid and it was stupid

53:55 this was really my first but yeah i don't i don't remember what i said i just said the lines because that was i mean it's not like we're not talking about d-list actors no and these people i mean you know they went on to do other things yeah you know michael iron's side he's he's jester he's known from other movies ernie hudson obviously known from other movies um i can he's he's he's oh he is jester's a six is jester's is a three yeah he is yeah somehow he yeah um yeah you know

54:30 peter Strauss i can't think of anything but i remember looking up his internet movie database of everything he's in a lot of tv shows he's one of those guys that shows up on an episode of this and he's that guy you're like oh it's that guy and kind of a cool thing i think i got this right when he's not acting he owns a winery and makes wine which he that's a system my book we're already like yeah i'd go to who's winery where is it you know or maybe some where is it okay he does some sort of farming that's really cool so he's not just he doesn't just get it he does a lot of

55:03 humanitarian stuff so but yeah it's it's just a weird movie it's just so yeah i don't i don't i mean i don't think a lot of people were thinking this was going to be your end to molly ringwald pay i hope we surprise some people i think we did i i sure we surprised everybody and this movie's garbage i'm gonna say i'm gonna finish i'm gonna finish up my take on this movie by saying that it holds up because it is exactly what i remember it being i remember being not all

55:39 that great creepy weird dirty dingy dusty unintelligible and just but i was drawn to it maybe because we only had like four movies on tape at that point i don't know yeah but it's exactly what i remember that's not making it good it's just what i remember so it holds up to what you remember yeah okay what about you Brad it's garbage Brad we get that but as much as i don't want i do have to i i agree with brock it holds up to what it was yeah it was i mean listen i know everybody's like oh i don't

56:17 ever hold this holds up it was garbage then garbage is garbage it is what it is i mean it does not it it did not deviate from its formula it is a cheap knockoff of Star Wars it does it did exactly back then what it tried to do now like it is still a garbage movie and that's what it was back in 83 and by that standard by the standard of this podcast it holds up so meaning that it is better

56:49 than every movie we reviewed except for the world's greatest athlete at this point so um i mean that's a really weird way i think i know having not seen it as a kid i mean the only thing that like i had mentioned at the beginning of the podcast that i remember Tyler and i like flipping through you know showtime and HBO and trying to find something to watch and and stumbling i know i'm i recall seeing the maze ski with molly reynwald because i remember saying that to broccoli or watching i was like wait doesn't she like get through this mate like

57:20 she actually does the maze i was like hey wait doesn't she do this maze so i know i've seen that part but um i mean it it it holds up because like the the things that i remember were clicking and finding pieces of it being like no i'm not watching this so so i agree like it holds up because my impression as a kid was uh no this is yucky it's yeah yeah i don't want to wear sort of way this one holds up so there you have it that's face hunter adventures in the forbidden zone

57:53 and um hopefully you don't have blood loss from your ears out there you'll go talk to your grand man so uh all right so what do we need to do now we need to do our social media bullshit that you guys always handle i need to write this stuff down i can't remember and like brad remembers all of it well we'll let brad all right at twitter as at hold does uh just facebook to search for us does it hold up and uh we have patreon if you want to go there and again i want to give it i want to

58:27 i want to thank i want to thank all of our listeners yeah but i really it is really cool to see international listeners i know a lesson we're u.s based so we kind of get but it is actually well i've seen some ones like different states i never thought i would see like a couple for minnesota which was cool uh it's just it's just cool to see wherever like whoever's down on this listen to the podcast i appreciate it we all appreciate it

58:58 it's just fun to look at and see we're just having fun yeah we're just yeah we're doing this for fun and you know we really enjoy going back and ruin our childhood so that's all this is about so that's what we're doing and i just yeah i just yeah i want to thank everybody who is listening um i don't have anything else for the social media port i don't know i think i to be honest jonzo i'm gonna get a little soapbox here i'm gonna think i'm almost thinking i'm gonna get rid

59:29 of a facebook page because facebook is bullshit facebook is bullshit and i'm not sure i like it anymore or like it's but i don't like it in a while yeah no i just everything going on hey listen right now we're in the hole recording at the time when there's the hole obviously the pandemic still going on covid-19 and then there's all these the riots are going on uh understandably yeah and it's just and and facebook has been out there and basically they're like we're not going

1:00:01 to we're not going to critique people's telling me face or false stuff and it's like bullshit like it's one thing if i say if i want to post something all right i don't really want to get in this nobody wants to go and look for us on twitter yeah put us on patreon and if we disappear from facebook maybe we'll show up on instagram or tick tock oh no instagram is the same as facebook we'll show up on french there or some shit we'll go other route i don't know my face we're gonna bring back

1:00:35 my space and we'll have a theme song and everything so yeah we put to echo what Brad said thank you everybody who's downloaded listen i hope you i hope you've gotten a laugh out of it and uh that's sort of one yeah right it's great watching us figure out what we're doing they don't watch the part right listen sir all right i i enjoy i enjoy watching it to a minute it's great uh no it's no exactly right i just hope that yes i just hope that everybody just it's a little uh you know

1:01:08 little i can't figure out that yes distraction that's the great word from your day that right now it's twenty twenty sucked and we're i'm hoping that's just a little you know distraction from that yeah let's go and three two one yeah just remember stay out of the zone and stay away from overdose bye bye bye